A year gone by!

Today Alexander Pushkin, Sukarno, Björn Borg, Steve Vai celebrate their birthdays, Chatrapati Shivaji Maharaj became a King, YMCA was formed, Tetris was launched, NBA was created, Battle of Normandy started, Venus crossed the Sun, the world will shift to IPV6 from IPV4 and I completed one year at Tata Motors Limited. One amazing year spent at Mumbai, Johannesburg, making new friends, meeting new people and going to so many amazing places. Hope the journey continues forever :)

This was my status message in Facebook on 6th June, 2012.  It has been one year since I joined the dream job that I had mentioned in my last post. It has been over a year that I've not blogged as well. I would accept at the outset that it is not because I've a super busy job. I had a lot of expectations in this job when I decided to select this over the OTHER Tata job that I had got after my Summer Internship at Tata Steel Ltd. This blog entry will also be an answer to a lot of my pals who remind me each time we meet that I had left a better paying job at Tata Steel. Tata Steel had been an excellent company and I had the fortune of working with very good people while I was working there, but Tata Motors is an Auto company where innovations like the Nano and also powerful image making products like the Safari. Post acquisition of Jaguar - Land Rover, it has some of the most beautiful machines that men has created. An example of that can be seen in this ad:

 

All this being said, now I work for Tata Motors Limited for over an year. A year that took me to a lot of places, made me experience a lot of things that I dreamed of and some which even were beyond my dreamworld. I joined at Mumbai for a month long induction that took me through the various stages of getting accustomed to being in a CORPORATE culture than the relaxed life one had in a B-School. Corporate world, now it sounds funny, because I still have the fun I had in college, albeit the people around me have changed. I'm lucky to be in Mumbai which is where half the classroom of any B-School gets placed. I had a lot of fun in the initial one month, mainly because of the location where we were accomodated during our induction - South Mumbai. It was amazing to be at a stone's throwaway from the best location in Mumbai called Marine Drive. I've spent a big part of my life in a coastal town and even now I say to my friends that a beach is not a great hangout place to goto. Marine drive is not even a beach, it is simply an artificial sea-wall built in the southern coast of Mumbai to prevent the water from coming into the town. But after 6 PM it lights up and gives you a simple but not isolated place to sit and gawk at the waves crashing onto the seawall. It is one of the best places to hangout with friends, have your share of looking at girls walking/jogging/running. Have a look and decide yourself if this is a beautiful place at night or not. I've spent atleast 10-20 nights chatting with friends till midnight and later in the night and the best thing about this place is that no cop, no moral cop will come and question you "kya kar raha hai be" even if it is 2AM in the night, no matter if the group consisted of more girls than guys.

Before I make someone feel that this post is gonna be a "I LOVE MUMBAI" piece like the one Pritish Nandy wrote in TOI blog, let me assure that it isn't so. So after a few weeks of spending each night at Marine Drive, chatting to new people who joined the job with you and go out to eat at all the amazing places in South Mumbai, we all got our projects. I got lucky in that regard and went on my 1st overseas trip(barring the short walk I had into Nepal while on a break to Darjeeling in my summer internship) to Johannesburg. The place was not having a great reputation, unless ofcourse you worked for the Mafia. People and websites started scaring me about the possibility of being mugged and even being killed for sums as little as $10(yeah, by then I was talking in $ and €).

Johannesburg or Joburg as the locals called it, is one of the best places I've visited. Yes, there were moments when I felt unsafe, there were people who scared the living hell out of me, but then I also loved the place a lot because of the amazing roads, the nice work culture of 8AM-5PM and most importantly because it had places where even Europe or US would've felt less opulent and at the same time had slums which were worser than the one's we see while landing at Mumbai airport. It was another country which had the dichotomy of having few rich men who held more wealth than the rest of the nation's population. It had a high percentage of people who were HIV positive and had no means to support themselves, so they indulged in theft, mugging and even murder. 

The city was a treat to watch from the air as I landed at 8AM on a cool morning at the end of July 2011. I was simply amazed at the lack of people on the ground and the speed at which vehicles were being driven. I saw trucks doing 100kmph with full load of 40-50 tons, even old people were driving cars older than me at speeds above 90 and the city had such an amazing road network. This is how I always will remember it:

 

The reason I loved the place most was because of the amazing roads. The whole country had  some of the best roads that I've ever driven on. Some dream surfaces like this:

I drove so much in this place that some days I had so much driving that I kept on driving even without stopping for a piss. I had an amazing time both in my work and in my free time. I was living alone and enjoying it. Technology made it possible for me to be in touch with my loved one's even when I was 1000's of kms away. I saw some of the best cars that men have been blessed with on the road on a daily basis;  lamborghini's, ferrari's, rolls, buggati's, bentley's. You name it and I had seen it on the road in Johannesburg. Even had fun with a few of them while driving my 7 year old Indigo, trying to keep pace with a prosche boxster after a signal and feeling amazing when the chick driving the boxster couldn't find the right gear and I got ahead for a second. 

It was a place where I drove more than 10000 kms and totally loved the 5 months I spent over there. I came back to Mumbai and took up my new role from 2nd of January. It wasn't sales, it wasn't marketing; it wasn't anything that I had ever dreamt of when I joined TML. It was a role that even now I'm trying to understand and the less told about it the better. I had a lot of good days when I've met a lot of people who are the big names in the auto world, I've had the pleasure of visiting facilities where some of the best vehicles of the country have rolled off from.

In addition to all this I had a big promotion in my personal life, I got engaged on 19th March, 2012 and since then it has been an amazing journey for me on the personal front. I've been the butt of a lot of jokes from my friends who keep telling me how much freedom I'll lose once married and what all I've lost already by being engaged. But I simply enjoy the feeling of being in a relationship and I somehow feel better. I don't know what exactly it is, or which exact moment it is. But when I'm with her I simply have a great time, I yearn to spend more time with her and most importantly I look forward to spending the rest of my life with my wife.......

The Lover

..........She held onto him tightly as he zipped through the traffic with finesse, like a pro race driver. She was always thrilled when they both were on a bike, and it gave her goosebumps when he drove fast and cut through the traffic. It was drizzling slightly and even though it could be bad for their health, they just wanted to go on and on. As a child she’d always wanted to drive a bike, maybe because she saw her dad driving the new Yamaha RX 100(15 years back it was new), from her childhood. Now she loved sitting behind this guy, whom she loved, as he throttled the modified 2000 model CBZ with its stylish toe shift system. She could feel him taking the bike to its limits; she loved it when the roar of the wind drowned the roar of the engine.........

She had a lot of knowledge about bikes; as far as a 20 year old girl is concerned. But then that wasn’t the single reason why she was different from other girls of her age. She hated the company of TYPICAL girls. Maybe it was because she spent 12 years in a girl’s only convent school, or maybe due to the fact that the two women who’d been closest to her in her life; her mom and her elder sister; were such nice people that she hated to be categorised into the so called NORMAL GIRL STEREOTYPE. Now this doesn’t mean she doesn’t live like a woman. She does have feelings of a woman, and the best feeling of all in them was that she was in love with this guy. He wasn’t the best looking guy in town, but then she wasn’t the best looking gal in town either. So she thought she’d go for something other than looks in her dream guy. Actually it wasn’t until he proposed to her that she though more about love and marriage and family and all. Because he was the first person who’d made her feel that she was a mature girl, a girl who could be made a wife, a girl who’d be a good mother to his kids. The day he proposed to her, she wasn’t in the usual dilemma of a girl if he was the right guy for her, instead she was thinking, was she mature enough for something serious like this?

That was 3 years back, now she had no doubt in her mind regarding the fact that he should be her life-partner, for he was the lone person who understood her without even her telling him the problem. To add to this, he had a great job now, working in one of the best Investment Banks in the world- Barclays Plc. He was a globe trotting MBA hotshot thanks to his IIM Ahmedabad PGP. In some way it was she who’d inspired him to pursue an MBA, even though he wouldn’t admit it to anyone. It was his wish to match her parents’ question of status in the society that made him quit his decently paying job and write numerous mock cat’s and ace the CAT and get 4 IIM calls(ACLI, if you ask). He always had the ability, but it was the focus provided by a desire to marry her that pushed him forward. She could still remember the day that he proposed his wish to marry her. YES, it wasn’t the typical, I love you and would you be my girl. He was bold enough to ask her, “Would you be my Wife?” It was on the 26th of June, 2004; the day that he got a job in Maruti. Maybe it was the feeling in his mind that he had a secure job, a soon to be completed degree, which would make him an engineer. So the next thing would be to have a girl. But he didn’t have interest in going for a college love story, especially since he had just one more year left to complete his B Tech. So he carefully evaluated a few girls. Yeah, even she knew that she wasn’t the first choice in his mind, he’d been frank enough to tell her that, and that was one other thing that she appreciated about him, his frankness and his boldness to tell anyone what he felt; even though he was painfully frank at times. He was a nobody in college, except for some people very close to him, hardly anyone knew him. He was someone who was THE guy when it came to certain things; like technical paper presentations or when someone's car broke down or a bike had a starting trouble; he was the guy who all remembered.

He had a great smile, a smile which in spite of his average looks made him handsome. He walked with what many would call a "happy bouncy walk", which as per some books and psychologists reflects a positive personality. Yes he did have a positive mind-frame when it came to talking about and certain things. But he was totally clueless about how he can have his future planned out.

Like all engineers he had a degree which said he was an engineer, but then he wasn't an engineer who knew each and everything in engineering. He was someone who could be called as a practical engineer; someone who knew how to repair a damaged TV,a broken down car, a malfunctioning amplifier and once he even changed the entire computer network of his department lab. These things aren't what many would call as great set of skills, but to have all these in a single man, that's where the greatness lies.

She on the other hand was what many would call a straight A student. Bright in academics and extracurriculars. She was the star of any programme in college. Be it a dancing competition or a Just A Minute event. She could baffle the audience with her sheer passion in the dancing and the amazing vocabulary she had when it came to speaking in front of a crowd. It wasn't just these, she could very well connect with the crowd and create a happy mood where ever she went. This was one of the prime reasons why he was attracted to her.

They both weren't what anyone would call a great couple. People were surprised when they told that they are together. Both their friends thought that they could get better people and they both deserved better. His friends thought she wasn't the type who'd make a perfect match for him and her friends didn't think he can match up to her talents. But they both somehow knew that the other was the ONE! This relation went on for a year until the time came for him and her to leave for their respective jobs. He went to Delhi since Maruti was his firm and she went to Mysore for joining Infosys. They both left on separate dates with promises to talk to each other daily. His training started and he was posted on the shopfloor at Maruti's Gurgaon factory, while she was posted to Bangalore after her training. They used to talk daily unless work was too much and they just didn't have the energy to talk to each other.

Like this one year passed and they hadn't met. They planned a meeting by taking leave together to come back home. So on 25th June, 2006 both of them reached Kochi, their hometown. They met the next day at Marine Drive and walked and talked for a long time. She felt happy to see him and he was delighted to see her. While talking and walking she noticed that he had changed a lot. He had put on some weight and his way of walking had changed from the happy bouncy walk to a rather slow, heavy walk. She heard him describe his work and how he used to be commanding workers in the assembly line at Maruti. He was talking with the same animated style that he had, but she noticed that he had an air of authority now which made him feel like the boss of things.

He noticed that her dressing sense had improved and she kept good care of herself and he felt that a good part of her salary was being spent on make-up. But then he thought, "WTH, why should I bother, as long as she's happy am happy". She also looked slimmer than the last time he had seen her, maybe it was the work catching up with her, or maybe the low-on-sleep lifestyle thanks to the job.

He then asked if she wanted to go for a drive. She had never come for a drive with him back in college days as she feared if she'd be seen by someone whom she knew, or someone her parents knew; eventhough she always wanted to do it. Today she somehow didn't think of what will happen IF... She just said ok and they both walked towards the parking and he started his bike and came to the place where she was standing. He stopped and flipped his visor off his helmet and said "Need a lift?" and she laughed and replied "your stupid sense of humour is still intact."

They drove through the Park Avenue and within some minutes they reached the highway and that's when he started speeding....................

...........she held onto him tightly as he zipped through the traffic with finesse, like a pro race driver. She was always thrilled when they both were on a bike, and it gave her goosebumps when he drove fast and cut through the traffic. It was drizzling slightly and even though it could be bad for their health, they just wanted to go on and on.

Both of them were talking about the good times they had back in college, about the jokes that happened and neither of them had a worry of what was happening in the world around them. They both had reached Vytilla where they were waiting at the signal when she suddenly saw that in the car stopped behind them in the signal was her uncle. She was worried if he had seen her and started to panic. He was also worried and she just wanted to get away from the place unnoticed. She had never thought about this until now. She wished she had never sat behind him in the bike. As soon as the signal was green she was telling him to hurry on and get ahead of the car as far as possible. He sped on, but still her tension wasn't relieved. She wanted him to get away from the car as soon as possible. In all this tension he was also getting worried and he lost focus from driving and also the rain started getting heavier.

They slipped on the road and the Scorpio coming from behind them crashed into their bike and she was thrown off the bike. She fell some feet away from the crash where he was jammed between the Scorpio and the road. Eye-witnesses said the crash was very bad and the girl died on the spot due to a head injury, he was alive when he was being taken to the hospital and all the while he wanted to know if the girl was safe. He was worried what her mother will say when she reached home so late. He was asking questions what happened to his girl, the girl whom he had loved. He knew something was amiss when no one told him anything about her. He had multiple fractures and internal bleeding from the accident and before he could reach a surgeons hands he also was dead.

At the time of death the only thoughts in her head were, if only she had not accepted to come with him in his bike, and his last thoughts were if only he was able to get her away from whoever was in the car behind.

If only the world didn't have a problem with two people falling in love with each-other irrespective of their backgrounds, they would both have been alive today.

PS: This was a post which I had started writing more than two years ago in 2008. I didn't know how to progress and how to end it, and I hope I've done justice to it.

Books - Man's best friend and mine :)

"Outside of a dog, a book is Man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx.

Books were a fascination for me during childhood. Not because of me being a bookish guy or anything. But then I've always liked reading. My mom had a good collection of novels from her college days and I used to go through them(except the Mills & Boon section) during my high school days. My dad isn't a big fan of fiction and he feels that reading stories isn't the best way to learn about the world(especially when the stories are written by Sidney Sheldon). So to get rid of me begging him to buy all the books in the world, he took me to the state central Library or commonly known as the Trivandrum Public Library. It was a great day for me. I still remember the 1st time I entered the huge doors as a thirteen year old and being awe struck by the rows and rows of books in the various reading halls. Since then my love story with books and authors had started and this relation, though had its ups and downs, is still going strong - much stronger than my OTHER love stories :).

This post will be about my fascination about books, some of the books that have changed my view about life and some of my favourite authors. The books and authors all came from different cultures, countries and ages, but influenced me greatly to THINK! If you are interested, read on to know their names and it would be good befriending them based on your interests.

I always was a fan of paperbacks; mainly because I liked reading lying on my bed before sleeping. This habit is still there with me and I still like the same type of stories. It started with comics when I was a kid; then Famous Five, Hardy Boys and then later on I graduated to novels and then stuff which I couldn't put my hands on as a kid :)

Books always used to be my 1st love, but since my life started having a new member called computer, books had taken a backseat. All through college my reading habit was lost and I picked up books again only when it was time for belling the cat - which ultimately belled me.

Then my focus started shifting from fiction to non-fiction. Particularly the autobiographies of business and political leaders and the so-called management books. Some of these were good reads, some were utter waste of time.

During my teenage I used to adore books by two authors; one was Sidney Sheldon and the other was Jeffrey Archer. I still remember the 1st Sheldon book I had read. It was Stranger in the mirror. It was like all of his other books, written like a movie with all the effects and special scenes that would make it a page-turner.

I'm proud to say that I've read all books written by Sheldon and Archer and I owe a lot of my reading habit to these two guys. If it weren't for their awesome narration and gripping tales I'd have left books a long time back.

Now any Indian in the 2000's who claims to be a book lover can't be ignorant of a certain individual named Chetan Bhagat. I've loved all his books and even though I feel that except for the 1st book, the others have had a very bad ending. Either being too filmy in style or too quickly wrapped up.

I’ll say that the books he writes talk about the social evils in our society, rather than just being funny. His 1st book talked about how parents just force their kids to take up ambitions for which they don’t feel the same way. The 2nd book talked about the youth’s lack of spiritualism in the present scenario. 3rd book talked about the evil of the religious riots. 4th book talks about the disconnect in our country when it comes to forming relations with people across the country.

So I feel he is someone who is required in our society which is at crossroads where parents are afraid to tell their kids what to do and what not to do, and even though Mr Bhagat has this cool dude image, his books actually help in putting some semblance into the Indian fast changing lifestyle :).

Top 25 books that I would love to mention are:(not all are from the world of fiction)

1. The Godfather - Mario Puzo - The greatest novel I've ever read, truly amazing.
   
2. The Alchemist - Paulo Coelho - A truly amazing tale of life,love and desire.
   
3. Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman! - Richard Feynman - An interesting side of a serious scientist.
4. The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkein - The only book which inspite of being a fantasy is in this list.
5. Atlas Shrugged - Ayn Rand - A totally outrageous but interesting philosophy.
   
6. The Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger - The confused teens story which was a great read.
7. Lateral Thinking-Creativity Step by Step - Edward De Bono - A good one for creativity.
8. iCon:Steve Jobs - Jeffrey Young - About an Icon's comeback to be the most admired CEO
9. Mein Kampf - Adolf Hitler - I wanted to know what was in the mind of the evil genius!
10. The World is Flat - Thomas Friedman - A great tale about the present world we live in.
11. Freakonomics - Steven D Levitt and Steven J Dubner - An interesting outlook to practical economics.
12. Relativity: the special and the general theory - Albert Einstein - The greatest physicist explains the most complex theory in the simplest way possible.
13. The Motorcycle Diaries - Ernesto "Che" Guevara - An awesome travelogue with great thoughts.
14. The Google Story - David A Vise - The most detailed account of Google's spectacular rise
15. The Communist Manifesto - Marx and Engels - Being a Malayalee, I couldn't miss this one!
16. Zen and the art of Motorcycle Maintenance - Robert M. Pirsig - A good insight into the human psyche
17. The Art of Computer Programming - Donald Knuth - For a non-software guy this is a bible to understand programming(for the software guys too)
18. Theory of Game and Economic Behaviour - John von Neumann & Oskar Morgenstern - An awesome book which explains the most baffling economic theory with ease.
19. Brief History of Time - Stephen Hawking - A man who's life is a great example to follow, explaining the toughest concepts with just 1 equation in the entire book.
20. Joker in the Pack - Nitesh Pahlajani & Ritesh Sharma - An awesome tale of love, friendship and life in a B-School, a must read for any MBA aspirant and .
21. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee - An awesome story of justice and a good eye-opener about the American society in those times.
    
22. Day of the Jackal - Fredrick Forsyth - A tale so realistic that I felt it was too much of a story.
    
23. Love in the time of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez - The best love story I've ever read.
24. Jeeves Series - PG Wodehouse - An awesome set of books which though funny are a great read anytime :)
25. Kiterunner - Khaled Hosseini - The last in the list is a book which made me feel sad and happy at the same time.
    

I hope you find the above interesting and thought provoking as they were for me.

My Generation

Don’t make someone a priority, if you are just an option......

I absolutely love this saying that I cannot find an author to give credit. It rings true everyday of my life. I have used this saying more than a couple of times in my GTalk status messages and also in my facebook, twitter and orkut pages. But till today I hadn't given serious thought to this line. You might ask what happened so much today to make me think about this sad fact of life. I believe it hasn't been a smooth sailing for anyone in their love-life, who ever says that they've the perfect love story, are either lying or are acting in a movie.

Now coming to the saying- Whether they are friends, family or a special someone they really can’t be that special if you are just an option in their life. I feel that people do make you an option in life, especially in your work, your college(at times it does feel wrong), your social circle and so on. It has been the norm in the fast moving world that we live in. I still remember the term Friendship of Convenience when it was told to me by a teacher at the TIME centre I had attended. He told about people being friends for just the sake of using eachother when they need something. People who think like:

How can I use him? He is well connected, financially well off, resourceful, he is a doctor, lawyer. Build and maintain the relationship, some day he could be useful. Usefulness goes, friendship goes.

I hadn't got seen much of FOC(not pronounced as the F word, but just F.O.C) in my life until I joined my work and their again in my training programme the company HR head told about the same term. He rather gave a 30 slide PPT on how to do the same quoted lines I've given above. But finally he told the term Social Networking, rather than FOC.

I had heard about networking since I am a part of the Orkut era, the Facebook generation, the guys who wake up and tweet their status and check their mails before going for a piss and will even F**K for the next best thing. Now when my generation decides to make friends it is a simple step. There are a thousand different places where you can meet people, maybe real, maybe virtual. But anyways you will always find people; more so because you live in a world with 6.6 Billion people. But still people will be happy to talk to some unknown on a website rather than with their next door neighbour or even to the people living in their homes.

There is a saying "my enemy's enemy is my friend." Common enemy goes, friendship also goes. True Friendship cannot survive without the element of mutual respect and that I feel is the one thing that lacks in these ONLINE, always there for you friends :).

I am not pointing fingers at anyone, I am very much part of this generation, I get happy when people say they "LIKE" my stupid messages in Facebook, or when someone RT's my tweets; why go that far, I ADORE the one's who comment on my blog and for me and my generation this has become a way of attaining social recognition, of having a status that they won't get otherwise. Especially fat guys like me who would not be able to make it to any happening parties or be invited to movies or hang outs because of their looks or because they can't dance that well and so on and on........

Now I feel I've digressed quite a huge bit away from the saying at the start the blog; so let me just FOCUS and get back to the point. (MBA has been doing its good bits to me too, don't you see the jargon's I've used till now :D). So I was talking about someone making you an option when you make them or rather plan to make them a priority. I feel that in the family life the FOC should just F*** off and you should have sincerity in your relationships. I can't imagine a father having a caring relation with his children only so that he thinks they treat him well when he's old. Going by the present way MY generation is going ahead I don't think even if we care for our kids they will take care of us when we're dying. Maybe this fear is making my generation to run more after the all elusive MONEY.

I still remember my dad's words when I had told him that I want to quit my job and go for an MBA, he was shouting into the phone that I am mad to leave such a well paying job and I don't realise the value of a government job. It is true, my generation doesn't know the value of a government job. Even after working in a government company I feel that I would do good in a private firm because their I will get recognised for my work. Its true that private firms reward people who show dedication and usually in govt. firms and departments good dedication means trouble for the person.

But then when I joined my course in July and in the discussions in class when people diss about government jobs and the work culture and how corrupt the officers are and that if the country is allowed to run by private firms then we'd beat US in a matter of years and all that wonderful ideas go around. Only the handful of people who've worked in govt. firms and have led a non-corrupt, non-maligned career(albeit short) will disagree and try to persuade that NOT ALL the officers are like that(heck I too was in that category a few months back, so how can I agree??).

My generation takes pride in the discussions and dialogues that we all carry out, but still we either never vote, or never care to know who wins the elections. As far as we are concerned it is always one corrupt guy to another, one uneducated fool to another and one idiot to another. But like the Tata Tea campaign I ask isn't it time to wake up and do something about it?

But then I myself am not doing anything about it other than proudly showing my finger off about the vote I cast, then why will anyone else do anything about it??

PS: Title credited to The Who for their wonderful song - My Generation.

*Disclaimer: I am being overly emotional tonight. These are the rantings of a person with absolutely nothing fun to do right now. And instead of getting studies done, is making non-sense blogs.

Rom Coms - The Female Chauvinists' way of getting even

I've watched a lot of Romantic Comedies(Rom-Coms as they're known) over the years. If I remember correctly the very first i saw would be Pretty Woman. I saw the movie when i was in 9th standard. I saw the movie at a cousin's home. He was an engineering student and had this movie's cassette(yes, VHS cassettes were the norm those days, not CD's) with him.

I loved the movie and fell in love with the too-good-to-believe gentlemanly Richard Gere in the movie and wanted to be like him from that day. He had the charm to get any woman he wanted and yet he didn't want any. I wish one day i could raise myself to such a level and then say NO to my mind when i see someone and my heart says YES.

The greatest surprise in the movie wasn't however Gere, it was the every lovable, innocent-yet-charming in her own way, Julia Roberts. I just couldn't control my laughter at the scenes where she barges into the meetings and then takes him off to shopping and all. But at the same time tears welled up in my eyes when i saw the emotional scene with Roxette's It Must Have Been Love in the background.

Since then i've been a sucker for Rom-Com's and have a huge list of those movies in my collection. The movies in this range from 50 first dates to Zack and Miri make a porno. These movies haven't helped me a bit in anything other than feel good at the end when the guy gets the girl. The movies always have a lopsided hero-heroine composition, be it Pretty Woman with a Ivy-League MBA falling for a Prostitute or 50 first dates with an amazing chick in Drew Barrymore falling for an oaf of a man in Adam Sandler.

Always these movies presented a totally unrealistic view of life(atleast for a guy living in India). They always gave ideas that were stupidest in the best of situations and still the guy ALWAYS got the girl in the end. There was a time when i used to believe that such a situation would happen to me sometime in my life and i'll also get that brown-eyed girl with the most amazing smile in the world.

I think these movies are The Female Chauvinists' way of getting even at the so-callled male dominant world. These movies make the innocent guys (like me) believe in stupid things that would never happen. This makes the girls they fall for behave in the most outrageous ways and then assume that things like that would come out to be all fine and dandy.

But sadly the world, especially this part of the world(also known as India) has people who've never had such experiences in their entire lifetime. Yours truly is a living testimonail of these girls getting rid of guys like me after getting their most essential needs satisfied(may not be the need you've got in mind). But still these experiences have never let me down and am still in search of the brown-eyed-girl.

Hope these movies don't make a mess out of the life some other charming young dude.

Finally the long wait is over

Yes, the wait for getting into a prestigious institute for getting an MBA degree has culminated in my life with me securing admission to the MBA(International Business) course at Indian Institute of Foreign Trade (IIFT). The news came on 19th evening with the publishing of the list of selected students to the 2009-11 batch. I got in the list of students selected to the Delhi campus. I was in my room after coming back from work that day. My room mate was having night shift and was on the laptop doing what he does best(don't get me wrong, but he goes through financial news and chemical process updates; my guru in financial terms and funda's).

I had a feeling that the result would be out even though the IIFT official version was to wait till 20th. I came in and typed in the address and then changed. The site always was showing the GD/PI shortlist until then, but that fateful evening it showed something different. Something that looked so good to my eyes, but at the same time brought fear in my mind. Fear about the fact that, if i didn't make it, then i'll have to work for another year and i was sure i won't be able to prepare with the same fervour i had this time, thanks to my boss who's always on my @$$ to point out some mistake or the other. So with all those fears i downloaded both the lists, the one for the Delhi campus and for the Kolkata campus.

After downloading, i put in my name in the find bar, 1st time due to some error, my name didn't come up in the list and the search bar glowed RED. I was shattered; totally devastated and just got up and went to the balcony of my room, from where i get this wonderful view of the plant.


I know its not wonderful, but i was just standing there and was thinking what'll happen to my life in the coming year. At that time my roomie said the file's loaded fully and he could see my Name in the list. I jumped back into the room and confirmed with my own eyes that i'd got in. The list brought tears to my eyes. I called up my ex-girlfriend 1st and told her that the result is out, but i can't see it as the net connection here is too slow. But i guess she could understand from my happy tone that i made it. I called her up coz I'd promised that she'd be the 1st to know when the results are out. Next I jumped out of the bed and went to inform Debasis, my partner here for writing the mock cat's every Sunday morning. He was sleeping in his room, and was quite shaken, he was very happy that atleast one of us made out of this hell.

Then i called up my parents. My dad was home and he was very happy as well for me. But being the dad he is, he asked me if i was sure that i wanted to quit my so-called-well-paying job and go for this course. I said YES YES YES! I've had enough of this job, with a Chief Manager who's never satisfied with your work and constant maintenance issues in the plant. I had enough of the work already and i had even planned to quit the job after completing 2 years in it, and take up a lecturer's job in my home town if i hadn't made it to IIFT.

More about my MBA journey in another post. Till then let me just enjoy the glory :)

A plain life

Ajay was a real simple guy, with simple dreams. His simpleton nature maybe attributed to his village life. He was the 1st person to become an engineer in his town. His father had great ambitions for his son. His father was the 1st graduate in town and was the 1st to get a government job as well. So Ajay had to improve upon that and he did that by being the 1st engineer in the entire village. He went to a town to complete his engineering degree. He got into mechanical engineering. Like all village boys in towns, he was also made fun of; for his dressing style from the 80's, or for his hair that he used to oil and curl up like some 70's film hero, or his simple study technique-where he used to write down each and everything he learnt 3-4 times so that he could get it into his head. He used to believe that he's from a village and has to work extra hard to overcome the shortcomings in his life and he did work hard and was lucky to get into a prestigious PSU when they came calling to his college campus looking for bright, young and dynamic engineers.

He got into NTPC and was posted to Singrauli Power Plant after his training in Gurgaon, where he learnt and re-learnt many of the funda's in mechanical engineering for suiting to his work life. He once again learned about Power Plant Engineering. He learnt new techniques like FEMA, TPM, Maintenance concepts etc etc. He was delighted to work in an organisation that powered the lives of millions of Indians everyday. He was also proud of the fact that he worked in a installation that produced 10% of the total power produced in the country. He was on 7th heaven when he was made a panel operator just after one year of getting into the job. He had the power of controlling the entire complex from his hand and at times he felt lucky to be at such a high position for a village boy he is.

He used to be well behaved to his superiors and subordinates and all of his subordinates were so happy that they vied with each other to get along with his shift for their duty. He was a soft spoken person and had a jovial attitude. He was an able decision maker and took the right decisions at the right time for the smooth operation of the plant. Slowly slowly the thrill of operating the panel died down and he felt bored doing the same monotonous job of watching the parameters on the panel. He needed some adventure in his job and jumped at the 1st chance when his boss needed a supervisory engineer to oversee the activities relating to the erection of a new fume stack(chimney) in the plant.

It was amongst the tallest chimney's in the world. Heck it was so tall that it had a lift for getting to the top of the stack. Except in special cases the top floor was kept out of reach for most people. The chimney was 181 mts tall. It was so tall that one could see the clouds below on winter times. He was to oversee a work for changing the airline mast which would warn approaching low flying air-craft about the tall structure. His job was to just stand there along with the safety inspector and make sure the job was done with proper safety equipments and precautions. It was simply boring standing there all the time but then he wanted a change from his boring routine in the panel.

He was to do the job in 3 days and would just stand there watching the workers put up the support structure for the light masts. He would walk down the steps and then take the elevator down. On the final day he was to inspect the wind deflectors by going down on the side of the chimney via a wire rope. He wasn't someone who was afraid of heights, but hanging down on a 181 mtr tall structure with just a rope isn't for the faint-hearted. He went down while watching each of his steps on the way down and also looking above at the safety inspector coming down.

After inspecting three of the wind deflectors he was going to the 4th and final one on the west side. The time was almost over for the day and the sun began its slow descent into oblivion over the horizon. He thought this is his last day and just turned around to see the sun go down. He slowly turned and saw the glory of the sun going down leaving streaks of reddish orange all over the sky.

He was very happy to see this and felt a special sense of happiness, never felt before in his entire life. He was happy to have seen the sun like that, happy to see the world from such a vantage point. That's what heights do to you. He was happy and just was enjoying the view when he heard a small sound, the sound of a rope snapping. He had just seconds before he felt the adrenaline rush to his head, the release of the special fluid that happens when body is extremely vulnerable or extremely excited. He was flying through the air and could feel nothing but the wind blowing across his body. At times he was trying to stay calm, but his mind was telling him about his impending death.

He fell on the ground on the evening of 5th March, 2009 and died. While he fell on the ground he could only think about all the unfulfilled dreams of his life. It is absolutely an absurd belief to think that your life flashes in front of your eyes while you're about to die. Ajay didn't feel a thing from his past. All he could imagine were all the unfulfilled dreams of his life; to be a lover, to be a caring husband, to be an affectionate dad, to be an admirable role model for his kids, to be a guiding force for his grand children. All dreams that he'd never dreamt about, but wished he'd the time to see them come true.

For Ajay death came as a unwelcome surprise, and it never made him see the life behind him like a fast forward film. Instead Ajay saw the unfulfilled dreams of his life.

So i tell you, never wait for the right moment, coz you never know what's in store for you the very next moment in life; so if you love someone and haven't got the guts to tell them, do it NOW! If you've been cruel to your friends, accept that in front of them; if you've been rude to your family, tell them you're sorry for it. As they say, life is not measured in the number of breaths you take, but in the moments that take your breath away! So keep it in mind and act accordingly.

Onam 2008

Onam 2008 was the best Onam of my life. Period!

I'd never had a onam like this for a long long long time. Only when i was a kid did i get to enjoy the onam like this. You're always special when you visit home after living outside for a few months. Maybe it's because the people think you're a GUEST and behave nicely to please you, or maybe some genuinely missed me being around. But whatever it maybe i really loved this break away from my monotonous work life.

I'd not really planned to come home for onam. But then my company was sending all new trainee engineers on a pan India trip in september-october and hence i'd to use all my spare leaves or else they'd lapse and go away free. So i thought of surprising my parents and freinds. But then cash shortage made me ask money from dad for the tickets, so that surprise was done with. Then i'd tried to hide my visit from my girlfriend and had hoped to surprise her. Again failed miserably. She seems to read my mind and i couldn't help but confess. :)

Then i didn't hide this fact and posted on our college batch community. Then the posts that followed were really NICE.

So coming to the point. Why i liked this onam was the fact that i spent more time with my family than with friends and i LOVED it. Usually i hated spending time with my family, especially on vacations. Almost all my breaks used to be spent with friends @ Kovalam or veli or some place like that, but miles away from home. Now being away from home has made me miss home and my family a lot and hence this time i was determined to give them some quality time. I loved it.
Spending time with friends also was fun, but this time everyone had time only to discuss their tight work schedules, bad bosses and horrible working hours :). Then the usual vayinottam @ Kanakakunnu palace grounds in the name of Onaghosha paripaadikal :). Went to Uni-Y for a great onam programme. This time i knew a lot less people than before, but then it was fun. Sheer fun.

Then the major thing i loved about this trip home is getting to meet my love. I'd missed her a lot and seems she also did so. I'd hoped to spend 2-3 days at the max with her, but then we made up for the lost 4 months with 4 meets in 8 days :D. That was totally awesome for me. She did manage to surprise me with a gift - A shirt. It seems she's good at picking nice shirts. She'd given me a shirt when i'd first joined for this job, but this time she'd the help of another common friend, and they both managed to WOW me with their selection.

Now i'm at the Chennai Central railway station while posting this, waiting for my connecting train to Cuttack and then back to hell. :) This might be my last onam spent with my family, or maybe the first in the series of onam's @ home. Only god knows.

Some snaps from my visit home.

This is where i started from

Catching a train. But where are the bogies?

A Kerala landscape pic on my way home.

Uni-Yans posin for Snaps - I relived my Uni-Y days once again.

Posing alongside the newbies @ Uni-Y

A kodak moment- Winning the Vadamvali @ Uni-Y

Onaghosham @ Kanakakunnu. Had a great time there.

With the Kalip pose-Atop the Lighthouse @ Kovalam

" Kovalam" or what's left of it

Had this snap taken @ Kovalam. Never seen foriegn kids playing on Indian soil like this :)

Trainil vere pani onnum illathathu kondu engene okke samayam kalanju

Before the theeta malsaram with friends :)

After the Theeta malsaram :)

Ona sadya was great @ home. Mom you're the best :D

Love struck

Dear me,

Why does it always have to be me who's got to say sorry, can't she get it that at times things work either way? Maybe i've done something that might have been too much for her to bear. But does being the man in the relation mean you've to take all the crap that's hurled at you? I've always loved her because she wasn't the typical girl, the one who'd get happy if i gave her a flower, or one who'd like me to gift her a card. As a matter of fact that's the LAST thing that i'd do. There were times when she loved me as much as i did. But now it seems its more of a compromise rather than real love. I just find myself at a loss of words when i think about the last time we had a good talk for a full week without her thinking there's no future in this and it'll will never happen, or her thinking that she's not good enough for me. I've lost track of the times i'd had to call or sms an apology so that i could just hear her voice, or get even a missed call in return. I don't know what's so special in her that even on my worst days at work, a small 'hi' from her would change my mind. I've always wanted my partner to be someone who's not binding me to any conditions, or asking me to achieve certain objectives. But again and again i chase dreams that were never mine. I work so much to keep this relation intact. But now its making me feel bad, feel sad. Asking myself if it's all worth the pain. My mind says no, but as its with th heart, it says YES. What'll i do if this is how it's going to be? Or will it improve? Or will it get worse? Only you can tell my dear, only you!